she is the kim kardashian of front butts
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
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