so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Randomize
