You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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