When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
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