gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
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