not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
