amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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