Where is the hickey?
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Randomize
