I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
