I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
