the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
Randomize
