Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize