I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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