I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
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