If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Randomize
