Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
They have beer where we have blood.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize