i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
My vagina is very pro this idea
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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