she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
