i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I am naked and annoyed.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Randomize