If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
