I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
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I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize