I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
