At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
