No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
