Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
