I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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