Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
