So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
