I didn't shave. On purpose
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
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