so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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