Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
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