you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?