my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
