Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
