I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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