So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Randomize
