You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
