her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
