i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
