If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
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