she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
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