i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
