so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Randomize
