This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Randomize