I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
How naked do you want me to be?
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