I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
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i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
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Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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