how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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