Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
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