just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
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