me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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