i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
25 Shocking High School Scandals You Won’t Believe Are True
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
Randomize
