mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
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